Balancing Chemotherapy With Other Responsibilities

After a few weeks of treatment, I could see the effect of chemotherapy on my dad. Despite the exhaustion and ongoing weekly treatments, he wanted to keep his job. Looking back on this, I think it was his way of keeping a normal life. He still worked and interacted with the family just fine—he just needed breaks more frequently.

So how was this going to work? How was I going to keep up this crazy balancing act of caregiving—chemotherapy appointments, getting the children to school and activities, managing the household—and not lose myself in the mix. I felt there was nowhere to turn for help in caring for my family. My husband worked 40+ hours a week just to make sure we had a place to live and food in the house. My parents contributed as much as possible, but most of their income went to co-pays and medications. I had days of no sleep, no breaks, and no help. Some days were definitely better than others. Somehow, I managed everything. I knew I needed help, but never received any. I felt so alone.

Staying Optimistic

As time went by, days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. Scans showed that for every few lesions that went away more appeared. It became clear we were fighting a losing battle. But through it all, my dad wanted to fight. His will to survive was amazing. My dad would go to work everyday that he did not have chemotherapy. Because the chemotherapy was not eradicating or curing his cancer but was giving him some extra time, we decided not to increase treatments to more than twice a week. He was tolerating the current treatment plan and was able to keep all his hair. That was remarkable in itself. I was simply amazed by how dad was facing chemotherapy and all that went with it. He never gave up and was always optimistic. No one around him said a discouraging word. Instead, we cheered him on and secretly hoped for the best. I truly hoped that one day we would walk into the oncologist’s office and he would say a miracle had happened—that my dad was cured and this nightmare would go away.